I can't see a thing

I've never seen so many boats on the car park, seems like everyone wants their bottom scrubbed this winter. Proper thing too, you dirty lot. But it does block my view of the shower block which I understand is to be refurbished this winter. Now I will have to rely on rumour and innuendo like everyone else!

The Fish Who Loved Me

Were you watching ITV1 last night? I'd just finished watching I'm a Celebrifish and was about to turn in when I caught a glimpse of me so I quickly woke up. Imagine my surprise to see this story about my old mate Mike Newitt CMG, who used to sit on my tail and tell me exciting tales about his undercover missions and assorted herring-do. I'd never mentioned it before as he'd spoken to me in strict confidence, so I was gillsmacked to discover it was all an elaborate hoax. How naive am I? He even made me sign the Ofishal Secrets Act.

Anyway if you missed it, here's the link to ITV's re-play thingie, the bit you're interested in is just after the first commercial break but it won't let you skip the adverts I'm afraid. Note the footage of James on the phone, that's not something you see very often is it.

It all happens at Waveney River Centre, innit.

The Whole Of The Hole

You know that big hole I mentioned last time? Well here it is look, as the concrete is being poured in. For the anoraks amongst you, it is 12m x 9.5m x 3m and now has 17 cubic metres of reinforced concrete in the bottom plus 15 holding-down straps. The doozers in the picture are Gary, Richard & James, plus Chris from the pub who decided to pull concrete about instead of play golf with his mates. Once the plant's in and commissioned, they can pour poo in one end and get drinking water out of the other. Any volunteers to test it?

No! Not more mess!

I despair, I really do despair. They've only got the campsite dug up AGAIN. Something to do with better drainage allegedly but personally I think they just like mud, it's the only rational explanation. And it's not even Richard doing it this time, they've got Ash & Dave from AL Landscaping slinging clods of clay about. Because Ritch & Gary are too busy with a hole big enough to drop the shop into, I kid you not. Something about a treatment plant I believe, though why you humans can't just poo in the river like any self-respecting fish is beyond me.

Born Again Conservationfish

I couldn't believe my fishy ears last week; there I was listening to Radio Norfolk whilst attending to my dental hygiene and I nearly swallowed the floss. For who should be spouting forth on the subject of conservation but my boss. You can listen to it here, should the mood take you.

Wildlife Spotters News

I saw an otter! I really did, I saw an otter, and Gary saw it too. Right by my tail. All that conservation stuff must be paying off, even otters have heard that this is the place to be seen now.